Archive | July, 2013

Hospital & Family Death

26 Jul

I’ve been missing for a bit because I’ve had one hell of a week. Let me fill you in. About a week ago, I had my first night alone in the apartment, so while hubs was playing a soccer tournament I decided to clean out the baby’s room that was full of clothes and our bags. I started with the bags, unpacked them, and put them away in our storage room. I then had one thing left I wanted to move, I had a box that wasn’t too big or too small, but very light, and I wanted to move it into the storage room as well. I was so happy and proud of myself for accomplishing cleaning up the storage room and the baby’s room because its been bothering me- I’m a clean freak, I like things organized. As I was walking to the storage room with the box, because it was wide, I didn’t see the counter top of the kitchen where it ended, so the box hit the counter, bounced back, and hit me in the stomach. Exactly we’re the bottom of the box was was where my uterus was. It was none the less a light hit, since I wasn’t going 50mph. I said to myself ouch, that was bad. Really bad. Nothing should hit there. I shrugged it off and said I’m sure it’s ok it was very light, but then I started feeling pain. Cramps. Shit. What do i do? I panicked and got in the car to drive to the hospital. As I call my husband he’s not answering, he’s playing in a soccer tournament. I get to the hospital, no blood, just light cramping. I try to calm myself down. I’m sure everything is ok. This is my miracle baby, Im sure god is protecting it and everything is fine. I meet the doctor, she seems worried. Started doing an ultrasound and we see that the placenta is as big as the baby, if not even bigger. She tells me you’ve hit the placenta, and it was a really bad hit. Not only that, she tells me that if I was in week 35-36 that they would deliver me, and now they just simply can’t do much. They have to check me into the hospital and keep an eye on me because the baby may separate from the placenta a day or two afterwards. At this point I’m in tears saying call my doctor, bring her in; and she tells me your doctor can’t do anything for you right now. What will she do? At this point I am just sweating and shaking, I call my husbands aunt to come be by my side while my husband finds a ride to the hospital. And for all I know, I’m just waiting to start bleeding or finding out in another way that this pregnancy is doomed. I go into my room and they start giving me IV and shots of progesterone and pain killers as well as something to calm me down. For I wouldn’t need to be calmed down if only that doctor hasn’t told me what she did! The next day my doctor came in and told me don’t worry about it, it happens…you just have to relax and the placenta should go down on its own. Don’t worry too much. Agh…I wish she was there the day before. When they called me down for the ultrasound my poor husband was sleeping, so tired and exhausted due to what happened the night before as well as due to fasting. so i let him sleep. i was too nervous to have him worry with me, i just wanted to go an see first what happened to our baby. We did the ultrasound afterwards and the placenta had not only gone much down, but the baby was playing and moving around. The clearest I’d ever seen it since conception. My heart melted! I really had wished at that point that my husband was with me. I was shortly released from the hospital afterwards and we went home to change quickly and go to his parents house to have Iftar (breaking of your fast). Once we arrived, still in pain from the hit, I was barely pulling myself together, we found out that my husbands younger cousin had passed away in a car accident while visiting Makkah (our holy land). It’s been a tough week. Very tough on both baby and I, and on Tuesday I will go in for another check up ultrasound to see how the baby is as well as see if we can have a clearer view of the gender.

Ramadan Kareem

16 Jul

It’s been a while since I’ve updated. We’ve still been pretty busy getting the house put together after moving, and now the holy month of Ramadan has started for us. What’s been happening so far? Well. I promised some of you that I would post some pictures from the nursery but it is a complete mess right now and is being used as a storage room as well, so I must clean it out first! But here’s the picture from online where I bought it

In other news…I finally told the rest of my family and friends about our pregnancy a week ago. They were over the moon. Just unbelievably happy for us and some of my friends even cried! I used to sit and cry to them about not being able to have a baby…an how much that really was killing me inside. I couldn’t believe their reactions, some of the sweetest people out there. Apart from the few people I chose, this is pretty much a secret to the world. I am not ready to have other people know anything yet.
I had another uti scare a few days ago. I have been having uti pains that I had before when I first got told that I have it. I kept ignoring it because it would come n go away but then it got so bad that I had to go and do a urine test. Culture came back normal. Weird. And now I am contemplating running into our doctors office to complain to her. I don’t know what the pains are and they are really worrying me. Well, have I ever told you guys that I had a bunch of dreams and a hunch that I’m preggers with a girl? Well now all my dreams are about a boy! I was almost 100% sure it was a girl. So now, hubs and I made a decision to go at the end of this week and just give it a chance to see if the doctor could find out if its a boy or a girl. So I’m thinking on Thursday I will go and hit two birds with one stone, even though I know it will be hard at this time for her to tell us the gender. Either way we will see.
Symptoms so far? Boobs are still so sore(maximized at the nipple area), belly is growing yet still looks like I ate too many doughnuts, it’s not really very round yet. And hair? My hair is JUST starting to fall out, I’ve heard it falls out in the beginning of pregnancy, but at the quarter mark? Weird! And then now I have hair on my tummy, something I never thought would happen! I’m fair skinned and don’t have much hair at all, but pregnancy brings weird symptoms and this is just one of them for me. Yet I’m too afraid to shave it or wax it. I think ill keep it there even though it really bothers me.
As for Ramadan, I’m not fasting, but I’m enjoying this month of getting closer to god and reading the Quran to my little baby ❤

12 Weeks

1 Jul

We have officially entered into the 12 week mark. I can’t believe it, I really didn’t think it would happen. I thought that my odds were better off with me having a miscarriage. I mean, it’s very hard to get a positive on your first IVF cycle, so I’m def bound to have something terrible happen along the way! I just kept counting down until Sundays appointment to make sure bambino was fine because I had done something I shouldn’t of done beforehand. I’m scared to even share it in here from the judgements I might get! I actually bought nursery furniture *gasp*!!!! Yes. I can’t believe I did it either, and hubs didn’t want to. Here’s what happened, for fun about 2 weeks ago I started looking at baby stuff to get an idea of pricing etc. and then I found the one furniture set that I’ve always in my mind wanted to get for my baby- but it was on sale (amazing sale!) and about to be discontinued. I went through it a million times with myself, and the truth is as much as I would hate to buy anything now when it’s waaaaay too early, I would hate myself if I let this go. Let me give you an idea, a 3 piece set of crib, wardrobe and dresser with some accessories was about the same price as one nice crib somewhere else. The whole thing the same price as just a crib!! Finally I thought to myself, if this baby isn’t meant to live, it could die at 6 months or even at birth, and not necessarily just now. I was afraid I was still jinxing bambino though, my heart was aching. I still havnt received the furniture yet, and again I know it’s still early, but I couldn’t let it go. If something happens, I hope our future baby either way will sleep in it. Fml moment that im still even judging myself over it.

Onto our 12 week scan! Bambino looked wonderful! The doctor said I know you’re so worried, but I see your placenta and here’s your baby, this time bambino was sleeping. Had a stable heartbeat of 154 bpm. It made me relieved. I didn’t kill my baby with my purchasing of nursery furniture!

Now I have to wait a whole month until I have another ultrasound. I don’t know how ill do it, I constantly think of the worst things happening and I just hate it. Hopefully though, a month from now, we will be finding out the gender of the baby, if bambino cooperates 😊