Archive | August, 2013

Kicks, Nursery & Belly!

27 Aug

So many things have changed from week 18 to week 20! I went from not feeling pregnant (and not looking it) to both looking it and feeling it! Wow! Before week 19, my belly looked like a gut. It wasn’t round and cute…my stomach was little early flat and then at the wayyy bottom had a big bulge. I didn’t feel like it was a baby bump at all, and constantly felt like I wasn’t pregnant. And then week 19 happened. I felt my baby girl kick for the first time!! How do I describe it…
I was laying down sideways after a long day and then literally felt two tiny tiny punches after another way down in my uterus. I nearly jumped up! It was the weirdest feeling in the world. That was the moment. The exact moment that I finally felt pregnant. That I felt the little life inside of me. It was the most beautiful feeling in the world. She then kicked a few times and disappeared for a few days which nearly gave me a heart attack! But then she kicked again afterwards…with a sigh of relief, I now have a way to keep up with the worry I constantly have about my little girl with just feeling her. She’s becoming more active now and a little bit more consistent with her daily kicks, even though I think it will take a few more weeks until I can figure out her sleep/awake schedule. Then week 20 happened. My uterus started rising up higher, and I finally look (and feel) a lot more round! I finally feel completely pregnant. And even though its just such an amazing transformation and time for me, worry is still there, even though I’ve finally let go of a lot of it. I started shopping for my daughters nursery decorations (without my husband constantly saying its way too early)…because he finally feels like I’m pregnant too! He felt her kick two days ago for the first time, and from the joy that was in his eyes, I started crying. It was just so beautiful. After all we went through, the months of endless and useless shots and doctors appointments, with finally IVF, we have reached that point. That point of enjoying this life growing inside of me. And even though I feel like its too long of a wait until I get to see her, I also feel as if it will happen so soon, and I must start preparing now. Slowly but surely, hope I get everything I need done before this miracle comes into our world. How will it feel when I first see her? I can’t believe we have to wait all of the 9 months to see what she looks like!
These are my current crazy emotions and update. I couldn’t wait to share with you guys the amazing milestone we have come to, and I hope that it continues throughout the rest of the pregnancy (God willing).
Xoxo

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Gender Reveal

15 Aug

It’s been an exhausting few weeks. You would have thought that my bump and stay in the hospital would be the only scary thing I would pass through- but no, life isn’t that easy folks šŸ˜Š the last few days I’ve been feeling ill, under the weather, with symptoms that kept sneaking up in my mind as listeria poisoning, and I have been freaking out. This month had been going fine, I had been passing through to my second appointment without a glitch and I was SO happy for that. My doctor thinks I’m an over paranoid mother to be with absolutely no self control (which may be half true when it comes to my baby lol). So after last night, when I had crazy stomach pains I decided that if I woke up this morning that I would go see her to do bloodwork to see if I indeed do have listeria or anything else that requires medication. The problem is, with all the family visiting and going to people’s houses, I can’t control what food they put out to eat, and how do I know that things may be infected or not?! What agony I have to go through just to eat something dammit! When we walked in, I told her my symptoms, and instead of bloodwork she decided to do an ultrasound. She said if the baby looked fine then she would just give me pain meds, and that listeria poisoning even if she did bloodwork wouldn’t show up right away, and even if it did, there is no medical treatment for it. So basically, stop eating random things and pray to God that you don’t have something horrible. Yay. Kind of. I am relieved yet not relieved at the same time. I was just happy to see that my baby was okay, and sleeping. And that it’s a GIRL!! After a month of running after her little lady parts, she finally decided to show us today! I couldn’t be happier, I am really really excited to buy all pink things. The food pointing is still in the back of my mind though, and it seems like this won’t be something that will easily let me be. Worrying about this baby has caused me more anxiety than I can handle, and I just wish that it was a little more smooth sailing than this. Will I ever get to a point where I won’t fear my baby being stripped away from me in a second? I don’t think so.